Adam Falcon - A Gathering of Comfort and Condolence

A Meditation Service of comfort and condolence was held Friday, Nov. 19, at 1:30 p.m. in Gunnison Chapel.

When the semester resumes after break, we will communicate plans for a memorial service after we consult Adam's family and friends on their thoughts and wishes.

Here is text from the service:

Prelude
Opening Words

We welcome you this gathering of comfort and care as we mourn the loss of Adam. We know that a lot of people have already left campus and many have other commitments, but at a time like this one of the most powerful actions we can take is to be together. And so we gather.

It’s been said over the past few days that it just doesn’t make sense -- all have spoken rightly -- because it doesn’t make sense. The tragedy upon us is so sad that we could fold under the weight of our grief. But we don’t fold or shut down because we have each other to draw strength and comfort from. And for that we give thanks.

For there is comfort in a people gathered together

For there is strength in a people gathered together

For there is love in a people gathered together

For there is power in a people gathered together

For there is hope in this people gathered

It is good to be together.

Reading

 One poet wrote…“We need a grieving room for all of us who are mourning, a quiet, safe place of solace where emotion is sacred and the continual falling of tears generates the energy for our healing. We need a grieving room with thick walls to keep despair outside and hope secure within, and, on the floor, comfortable pillows to remind us to rest.”

How do we care for ourselves?

It’s a curious tendency we have as humans that when we experience loss, we tend to neglect ourselves. And that’s not okay. So we wanted to NAME THE NEED to take care of ourselves in this time of overwhelming grief. We always look for something to do, but there’s nothing to do. Just BE...and in the being, be attentive to what you need and don’t hesitate to ask for what you need. Whether it be talking with someone, writing, crying, exercising, telling stories. Take care of yourself. Don’t be surprised if you find yourself experiencing waves of sadness or numbness. The heart has been dealt a blow. And one day we’ll be called to gently move on to our healing. And though it seems unbelievable, we will laugh again. Until then, tears are the companion on this journey.

Music

Reading

“Trust pain as well as comfort, perhaps more. For in pain we notice everything; in comfort there is not need to be alert. Believe, therefore, in your pain. Be present to it. Own it. The most deeply felt discomfort will not obscure your vision of healing but clarify it, until it is fitting to be comfortable again.”

A Time of Silent Reflection

Reading

One poet wrote…“In the absence of explanation, of understanding, of meaning, I find myself returning to the simple truths of childhood. And just as I did as a child, I will slip my hand in your hand for that familiar feeling of comfort and reassurance.”

Musical Interlude and Candle Lighting

We invite you now to come forward and light a candle for Adam and his family. At the same time we know that the death of Adam may remind you of other losses in your life so we invite you to light a candle for anyone else who maybe on your heart at this time.

Closing Words

Native American artist Mary Youngblood speaks of the importance of ceremony and ritual in her tradition. She says: “In ceremony and ritual we offer thanks to the Spirit for everything. On this day I give thanks for the gift of music. I lift my flute toward the sky and pray for only four things – wisdom, balance, healing and love. These things I wish for you as well.

Here at St. Lawrence we have a deep history – a history steeped in the wisdom and balance of those who have walked this land before us. In this time of great sorrow we look to the earth to draw strength, we look to each other to garner the wisdom to move forward with compassion, and we look to the light within in each of us to fan the flame of our grief into healing and comfort.

Remember “When we feel lost and don’t know what to do next, we should quiet ourselves with the question… WHAT IS NEEDED NOW? The answer will not only be a first step out of our present confusion, but a lasting gift to ourselves.”

There’s not one answer to that question, but among them is to…“Reserve some mercy for yourself, so when you are sure that all is lost, there will be one last great power to embrace you.”

Go in Peace. Keep an eye on your neighbor.

Postlude

Go in Peace !

 The readings have been taken from: Safe Passage: Words to help the grieving hold fast and let go

Updated: November 19, 2004
Created & Maintained by University Communications
Questions & Comments to: Lisa Cania, Associate Vice President for University Relations
315-229-5585